If half my body melted into a puddle
The other half of me would splash in it
And everyone would be befuddled

If half of my body could fly
The other half on the ground would shot
"Look everybody! Up in the sky!"

If half my body turned into cheese
The other half would eat it and people
would say "Can I have some please?"

If half my body turned into a squirrel
The other half would run away screaming
"Holy shit, it's the end of the world!"